life

Just when you least expect it, life happens. That's what I learned this month. Sometimes things that seem so perfect on the surface have a hairline fracture that, left untreated, turn into a huge crevice that's hard to repair.

It was hard to watch, really. I saw my ideal slipping, but there was nothing I could do to stop it. I thought if I turned my back or closed my eyes, that when I looked again the facade would be back in place. It wasn't. In fact, it got worse and continues to do so. It's what I like to call a crisis of faith. A place where God throws people to see how well they are up to the challenge, and honestly, the "ideal" has been found lacking. The faith is just not there. Sure, it's in there somewhere, but I would have thought it would come out by now.

We can't just trust God to do what He says He will do when things are good. Because, let's face it, for some, things are ALWAYS good and others, things seem to ALWAYS be bad. So, we have to trust Him right where we are and pray that we have the fortitude to walk behind Him while He leads us in the direction we must go. Sometimes, that direction takes us through smooth waters; oftentimes, the path is just that....a path without a whole lot of interaction with the really good or really bad; but occasionally, the path takes us through a rocky mountain climb and it is during those times that we must, absolutely must, trust that He has our best interest at heart.

Throughout all of these scenarios, I believe there is something to learn. Perhaps in this particular situation, the "ideal" must learn that not everyone leads a charmed life. Perhaps, the lesson learned will be how to live a "new" normal. I don't know, but what I do know is that throughout this, I have learned how incredibly blessed I am. I may not have the charmed life I so desperately sought in my youth, but I have something far more valuable.